Newer is Not Better: Tap Your Network for Strong Relationships
Newer is better. In many cases, that is a true statement; but not always. What about with relationships? Are new relationships better than old ones? Most of us would probably say no, yet our actions would tell a different story – when we need something, such as a job or advice, we tend to go searching for new people instead digging through our old networks. We often long to “upgrade” our professional network. Enhancing our network with newer, “better” people is fine, but the focus should be on strengthening and fully leveraging the connections that we already have.
I was reminded of this in the last week as I attended two Darden alumnae (women) events. The first was a session in NYC in which Professor Melissa Thomas-Hunt led a discussion on “The Nuance of Negotiation”. It was awesome – I’ve been looking for opportunities to practice my negotiating skills since. (MBA candidates: take a bargaining and negotiating class in business school!) The second event I attended was an informal networking event in the DC-area. There were four women there that I hadn’t seen in more than five years – one I hadn’t seen since she graduated from Darden in 1998!
As you strengthen your network, focus on who you already know or those that you can easily assess.
Do Have Established Relationships That Require Follow-Up?
The process of developing a relationship includes initiating the relationship, cultivating the relationship and then maintaining the relationship. You have done the work over the years to initiate and cultivate relationships; how are you doing in maintaining them? Consider your mentors, advisors, former managers, former work colleagues, mentees, professors, etc. When were you last in touch? Do they know what you are working on or working toward? Do they know how they can be helpful to you?
These are people that already know you and respect you. Often you need only ask and they will try to help. Don’t simply assume that because they were prominent in one stage of your life that they can’t be useful in another stage – while they may not be able to assist you directly, they may be able to connect you with someone who can.
What Networks Are You Already In?
Attending the two Darden events left me thinking about the powerful networks that I am already in, yet remain largely untapped. This is where you may say “of course, that’s why I want to go to business school to access the MBA network”. While I’m referring to my business school network, this sentiment applies to my undergraduate network, my INROADS network, my Goldman Sachs network, my MLT network, etc. Consider the communities that you are or were a part of. Have you fully leveraged those contacts?
When you are already a member of a community, it is much easier to initiate relationships. You have some level of credibility because of a shared affiliation. In my case, it is as an alumna of my business school. And darn it, I’m still paying for my MBA (I’ve got 17 more years) so why wouldn’t I aggressive reach out to other alums? Some of them I know and others I don’t, but we have a shared bond that can facilitate building a relationship.
Whose Business Card Do You Already Have?
Are you a serial business card collector – meeting people and getting their business cards? What do you do with those cards? Do you have a pretty stack on your night stand or on your desk at work? Do you reach out once and if you don’t hear back, never follow-up again? I can be pretty hit-or-miss with my business card follow-up. Here again is an opportunity. Have a plan for your new contacts. Maybe you want to classify them by importance (to you) and have a standard follow-up plan. We come into contact with people all of the time and make an initial connection, but then when we don’t know exactly what should happen next we put them in the “hold” pile, which usually becomes the “trash” pile when the contacts become stale.
